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Chapter Ten
The Ice Cap Opens

Eroica arrived at the TARDIS only to be told by K-9 that the Doctor and Jason had returned to the artefact. It seemed that this was the place to be, he reflected as he left the Police Box and started in the direction of the fissure. The ground was shaking more often now and he moved cautiously along the ice, taking care not to step on any cracks that might decide to open up beneath him.

He was so busy looked down that he failed to see the figure approaching and only looked up when he heard the crunching of footsteps. Eroica had to hold a hand up to shield his eyes from the glare of sunlight reflected off of the snow and ice. All he could make out was a silhouette against the vast white ice field. Blood hell, not the KGB again. Then he remembered the Major’s gun in his pocket and pulled it out, aiming it at the stranger.

“I have a gun, whoever you are!” he called out, wishing he didn’t sound so frightened.

“I would be concerned if I thought you could actually hit me, idiot,” came the Major’s voice.

Eroica felt all the blood drain from his face when he heard the familiar voice. “Klaus…” he said in a small voice, lowering the weapon. He tried several times to make a coherent sound and finally managed to say, “Aren’t you supposed to be dead?”

When he saw the space ship was open, the Major decided to try and find his agents rather than stay and see how the Doctor and Jason would attempt to descend the distance without any equipment. The Doctor suggested that he take K-9 with him, since he no longer had his gun. The Major had agreed with this and was making his way back to the TARDIS to retrieve the automation.

As the Major drew nearer, Eroica noticed that the steam he had been seeing was not the officer’s breath but the smoke from the cigarette in his mouth. “I am hard to kill,” came the succinct reply.

Eroica gave him a look through his eyelashes and held out the weapon. “I relieved Mischa the Cub of this. He’s under the impression that he killed you.”

The Major snorted, taking the weapon from the thief’s hands. He inspected it quickly, satisfying himself that the Russian had not damaged it. Looking up, he said, “And you believed him?”

“Major, as far as I know, the only way to get that away from you is to kill you,” Eroica replied truthfully. He did not mention that he had also witnessed the Russian shooting the officer and could not help wondering if Jason had had a hand in the German’s miraculous return from the dead. It would not be the first time.

The Major started toward the TARDIS and Eroica fell in beside him. He told the officer of the events that had taken place at the KGB’s base camp and the escape of his agents in the helicopter Mischa the Cub had sent for his own men. He omitted telling the Major about the android, thinking this might be best revealed when the Doctor was present.

The Major was amused that the Russian should be annoyed in such a manner, although he did not show it. “Where are the KGB agents now?” he wanted to know. He did not like the idea of having any KGB men on the loose and was slightly annoyed that his agents had left them behind, despite the fact that there wasn’t room for them all on the helicopter.

“Last time I saw them, they were sleeping like babies in their base camp,” Eroica replied innocently. “Your agents gave them a lesson in knot tying.”

Before the Major could reply, the ground started to shake and they heard an ominous cracking beneath their feet.

“I do not like the sound of that,” Eroica said nervously as he looked around.

Then two things happened at once. A crack appeared behind Eroica and the Major, and the ground vanished from beneath the thief’s feet as a section of the ice broke away. The next thing he knew, he was dropping through space and landing heavily on a ledge. He managed to push himself back against the ice wall before falling debris carried him to his death hundreds of feet below.

Once he recovered his senses, Eroica looked up, seeing the Major looking down at him, a stunned expression on his face. Are you surprised I survived? Or just hoping another tremor will knock me off?

Suddenly the Major was yelling at him. “Give me your hand, you stupid limey! Or do you want to stay there and wait for the KGB to find you?”

Several things flashed through Eroica’s mind, the most preeminent one being that the Major was making a show of saving him so he could “accidentally” lose his grip. He threw a quick glance downward, seeing the yawning chasm beneath. Oh, what the hell. I’m going to die one way or another.

Eroica got to his feet and grabbed for the outstretched hand, feeling the Major’s fingers clamp around his wrist like a vice. He grabbed the Major’s wrist with his other hand. A second later, the German was pulling with all his might.

As he was raised slightly, Eroica grabbed out with his other hand, pulling up on the top edge of the ice. At the same time, he kicked against the wall, struggling to find any foothold he could. He managed to find a crack in the ice and jammed his toes into it, levering himself up and finally managing to get one knee over the top.

In the distance, he could see the TARDIS standing out in stark contrast against the surrounding white of the glacier. Then he saw the KGB men, one of whom was taking aim at the Major’s back. Using the momentum from being pulled over the edge, he launched himself at the officer, knocking him to the ground.

“Get off me, you pervert!” the Major snarled.

“Certainly, Major. But I think I should warn you, we’re about to be shot at,” Eroica replied as he rolled off of the Major.

A split second later, a shot rang out and the Major was rolling onto his stomach, his weapon straight out in front of him. “Stay down!” he snapped, not taking his eyes from the approaching men.

One of the KGB fired, but it was obvious that they were fighting the same glare that had blinded Eroica.

“I thought you said my men took care of them,” the Major said accusingly.

“They did. Obviously, they escaped.”

“And where did they get the guns from if my men searched them?”

Eroica cleared his throat. “I never said they searched them.”

“Verdammt idiots!” The Major let loose a stream of obscenities, vowing to use the incompetent alphabets for target practice the next time he saw them.

The ground shook again, throwing the KGB men off of their feet. Then to the astonishment of the watching pair, the ground opened up, swallowing their would-be assassins, who vanished from sight, their cries echoing from the depths of the yawning chasm.

Eroica stared in stupefied amazement. “I don’t believe it.”

“Good riddance,” the Major snorted as he put his gun away.

Eroica rolled onto his side and propped himself up on one elbow. “You realize, Major, that we’re trapped here. Completely cut off from the TARDIS.”

The Major looked at the Police Box and the gaping hole stretching out for who knew how many kilometers in either direction. A hole that was now between them and it. Then he looked behind, seeing the gash in the ice that he had just pulled Eroica from. “So it would seem,” he replied blandly. He pulled out a pack of cigarettes and wordlessly offering one to the thief.

Eroica accepted the offering and the light, leaning back and taking a long drag on the cigarette. “You know, it’s funny. They say these things will kill you.”

The Major gave him a steady look. How many times had he promised himself that he would be the one to kill this irritating faggot? Now he was going to die alongside him. There truly was no God.

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