The Major opened his eyes to find the sun beating down on his face through a gap in the linden branches. He was positively drenched. His head was pounding. He turned his head and found his soiled, soaked shirt laying several yards away. He was slumped against the linden tree with the naked Earl curled up under his arm.

He reached his hand in his pocket to retrieve his cigarettes, and found them to be completely ruined. Schiesse. He needed one bad in the morning. From the position of the sun, it was a little after seven and he had oversept. He felt awful, especially since he had no idea what time the two had fallen asleep in each other's arms, or how long they had experimented in the rain. It had still been pouring when the Major had finally sung himself a lullaby with the exhausted Earl in his arms.

He pulled a leaf knocked down by the rain from the Earl's short curls, and the man stirred unexpectedly. A thought crossed the Major's mind, and he shook the thief awake, ignoring his groans of protest.

>"It is late! Get dressed, we do not need to surprise the groundskeepers on their morning rounds like this!"<

The Earl opened his eyes and gazed sleepily up at the Major. "What time is it?" he asked in English.

The Major took his arm out from the Earl rather unceremoniously to check his watch. >"It is 07:20. I should have been up nearly an hour ago. You need to get your clothes on now, the butler will be looking for us, wondering what happened!"< he snapped, dumping the Earl from his lap as he stood up, winced from the stiffness, and then walked over to retrieve his shirt. He picked up his undershirt and frowned as he wrung it out. There wasn't anything to be done about the mud stains, on it or his other shirt. He began wringing his overshirt out as well, trying his best to swat the clumps of mud and grass off of it, then bent down to do the same to his pants.

The Earl stood up lazily and stretched. The Major's eyes were drawn to the thief's rather natural grace with nudity. In the morning light, the man was a sight to behold, even covered in mud. He winced when he saw the visible signs of their activities all over the Earl's chest. The Earl had responded best when he bit a little as he gave him kisses all over his body, so his chest, arms, stomach, and thighs were covered with angry red marks as well as the sodden mud, grass, and leaves.

The Major was sure they both looked frightful. There wouldn't be much hiding from the butler, especially with the Earl's torn shirt, but as long as they weren't caught en flagrante, that was fine. He could shrug off the suspicious looks, largely because of his well-established reputation.

The Earl lazily retrieved his briefs from the ground and began walking over to the Major, taking the man in with his eyes as he approached. The Major gave him an irritated glance, wishing the thief would hurry up already, as he tried his best to brush the mud from his chest and face and wipe the mess out of his hair.

The Earl reached the Major and gingerly plucked a leaf from his chest and looked at it. >"You know, Siegfried gained immortality by bathing himself in the blood of a dragon he slayed, but his downfall was that a linden tree leaf fell on him during the process, which left him with one weak point on his back. Perhaps it is the same for you, Major."<

The Major found himself short-tempered this morning. >"If you have enough wits about you to spout nonsense, then put your clothes on! We need to go back to clean up and appear at breakfast. The staff will be here any minute looking for us."<

The Earl gave him a pouty look and began to pull on his underwear. >"You are certainly not a pleasant morning after lover."<

>"I don't care what I have to be in order to get you into your clothes! Pants! Belt! Socks! Shoes!  Shirt! Now!"< The Major barked as he pulled on his own undershirt and began buttoning his overshirt. He was secretly very glad that the Earl had not been as eager to get his shirt off as he had.

>"But everything is wet! I cannot wear it, the shoes won't be good for my feet!"<

>"I won't be good for you in a minute unless you are decent by the time I count to ten!"<

At this the Earl started and ran over to put on the rest of his clothes. He pulled on everything but his shirt, and threw that over his arm as he sourly rejoined the Major. The Major looked at the man with disapproval still clear on his face. >"You need to put on your shirt to cover up the marks. It's important."<

The Earl gave him what the Major could only categorize as a leer, then pulled the remains of his shirt on over his slight, but muscular frame. >"You didn't seem to think wearing a shirt was very important last night, Major."<

The Major's face turned red. >"Do not do this, Eroica! Do not make me mad at you! You are infuriating, and I do not want to deal with it today!"<

The Earl straightened his face and saluted, the tattered, sodden, and filthy shirt hanging open at his chest, doing nothing to conceal the marks. "Yes, Major, understood!" he replied in German.

The Major turned on his heel and began stalking off in the direction of the castle, assuming the thief would follow. >"Do not call me 'major,' you are not one of my men."<

The Earl had indeed followed him, and was keeping pace with his hurried strides, an amused look on his face. >"Oh, that's right, I forgot!  It's Major-General now!"<

>"No! Do not address me by title!"<

>"Well, then, you don't, either. You only call me "thief" or "Eroica," and sometimes "Earl" if you're trying to be nice."< The Earl paused a moment, then broke out in a grin. >"Then does that mean you would like me to call you Klaus?"<

The Major reddened. Hearing it out loud, in the thief's voice was embarrassing. Nobody but his father had called him by his first name in a long time. He didn't like that either, but he didn't say so out loud since that put things back to Major. Or Major-General, he supposed.

The Earl picked up on his hesitation. >"No, that's probably too intimate for you."< He mused.  >"I suppose there's no better name than Siegfried."<

The Major scowled, but said nothing. He didn't like pet names, but he admitted to himself that it was better than the alternatives. But he knew the thief was tormenting him. A simple thought crossed his mind.

>"Very well, but only if I call you Brunhild."<

The Earl scowled. >"Ugh. What an inelegant name."<

The Major noted there was no other protests. Well, that was settled. It was ridiculous and embarrassing, but he could pretend it was like having a code name.

Just then, the Earl stumbled, and without breaking stride, the Major caught him and drug him along until he regained his footing, thinking nothing of the activity. The Earl smiled wanly.

>"So. Did you perform your own version of the gerichtslinde under the tree last night?"<

The Major pondered the question. He supposed he had. The Earl had passed, though there was still a lot he was going to have to get used to. He would have to figure out how to let the thief know he was welcome to stay in the castle from now on without telling him overtly. He frowned as it occurred to him that it would likely be key in keeping his thoughts together to have the Earl around as much as possible. He knew that he would be a mess if he had to wait for Saturdays as they had been.

He avoided the question and offered an anecdote of his own. >"That tree is almost 1,000 years old. It served as the gerichtslinde for the city of Eberbach until about 200 years ago."<

The Earl's face brightened. >"Is that so? How unlike you to lose yourself in a reverie like that. But it is good to know. I suppose your family has always been a benevolent presence in Eberbach, or your castle would have been razed centuries ago."<

>"Yes. We were the lords of the region until they got rid of that system. It had always frightened me as a boy, knowing that and knowing what happened to the lords in France. I always thought, when I was young, that the villagers would come up if they heard I'd done something wrong and guillotine me."<

The Earl laughed. >"I suppose that's where you get your strong sense of right and wrong, then, having been frightened straight by the guillotine as a boy. I can't say that thought ever crossed my mind."<

The Major exhaled and wished for a cigarette for the second time in ten minutes. >"No, that was my father again. He was the one who told me about the Guillotine and the tree."<

The Earl was quiet a moment, then spoke softly and seriously. >"I take it your father would have been pleased with your new rank?"<

The Major snorted. >"No, my father raised through the ranks very quickly. During the war, he got promoted all the way to Lieutenant General and General der Panzertruppen."<

The Earl frowned. >"Certainly he would be proud of you for earning the rank by withstanding torture. It was quite an ordeal. You're blind in one eye, for God's sake."<

The Major snorted again, amused by the Earl's efforts to make the Major remember his father. He knew the man had been on good terms with his own, but... well. >"No. He was captured and kept as a POW in England after the war. Though the English didn't torture him. He did have his nose shot off in France during the first war, though. He had a rubber nose. His face without it was terrifying."<  The Major shuddered at the memory.

The Earl laughed again. >"I'm... I'm sorry, it's just such an amusing mental image. You as a small boy being terrified by your noseless father."< The Earl sobered up. >"But he sounds like a real war hero."< He frowned. >"And he must have been quite old when he had you."<

It was the Major's turn to let a reluctant bark of laughter slip. >"Yes. He was over fifty years old when I was born. The relic was over 100 when he died. I have no idea how he did it, he was shot several times during both wars. But yes. He was a war hero, such as it was. They kept his Wehrmacht uniform and awards and have it on display at the Deutches Panzermuseum in Munster."<

The Earl was quiet for several minutes, watching as they approached closer and closer to the castle. >"A hard act to follow, then. A father who lives as a war hero and is too old to remember what it's like to be a boy."<

>"Yes."< The Major wished desperately once again for a cigarette, and hoped that the Earl would drop the conversation.

The Earl was only quiet for a few minutes before he spoke up. >"You know, we could just slip in through your bedroom window. You know, climb up the wall to get there. It's not terribly hard. Then we wouldn't have to have this confrontation with your butler that you seem to be dreading."<

The Major frowned. He'd be damned if he was going to break into his own house. >"It is like you to think of that. No, he would have already checked the bedroom and found it empty. We cannot... just sneak in through the window like delinquent schoolboys. We will go in through the front door like men."<

>"Through the Gates of Hell it is, then!"< The Earl cheered enthusiastically, taking the Major's arm.

The two made it into the castle within the next several minutes, the Major disengaging his arm from the Earl to open the front door. He brushed past the confused-looking butler, offering the simple explanation that the two would take a few minutes to clean up, then would be down for breakfast. The Earl held his tattered shirt together, mercifully, but there was no hiding their sodden, filthy clothing, or the fact they had been out all night in the pouring rain.

Nor could he hide the thief's radiant smile. Schiesse.

*****

The Earl stayed silent as he was led through the castle and to the Major's private quarters. He had seen them the day before, of course, and on several other night ventures to leave birthday and Christmas presents while the Major slept. But the room never failed to disappoint him. The Major had taken down all decorations and non-essential items from all the rooms in his suite, and the only thing to rest the eyes on was the rather sparse furniture. It was centuries old and beautifully carved, but his bedroom had only a bed, an armoire, and a tall chest of drawers, his study had only a desk, several bookcases, and an ancient sofa with a low table in front of it, for what purpose the Earl could not imagine. There was also a tiny guest bedroom off the study which contained only a small bed that had been stripped of its sheets. The bathroom, a modern addition in the corner of the study, held only floor-to-ceiling white tile, a large, claw-footed bathtub with a modern shower fixture and curtain ring suspended above it, a toilet, and an old-fashioned sink with a mirror above it.

Aside from the furniture, the Earl imagined that this was what it was like to be in prison. There were only small windows, high up on the wall, and none in the dim cell of the guest bedroom.

It was just the Major all over, and he simultaneously despaired at the lack of presence and rejoiced at being allowed into the Major's private quarters.

He watched as the Major began going through his armoire, selecting a few outfits out. >"You are smaller than I am, but you will have to wear my clothes today. Here."< He said, tossing a drab button-down shirt, a pair of plain black pants, an undershirt, and a pair of briefs on the bed. He chose a similar outfit for himself, but with brown pants and a tie, and took it with him into the bathroom.

>"Wait!"< The Earl called out, following him into the bathroom. >"You really expect me to put on clean clothes without showering? After rolling around in the mud all night? You're out of your head."< He put his hands on his hips and gave the Major his best condescending glare.

The Major hesitated. >"Well? So wait until I am finished and get dressed, then join me for breakfast downstairs. It makes no difference to me."<

The Earl raised his eyebrows. >"Well, no, that's not what I had in mind. I was thinking we would go down to breakfast together."<

>"No. I'm too hungry to wait for you to finish. You will take forever with your degenerate primping."<

The Earl raised his eyebrows even further as a smile broke out on his face. >"Oh, my degenerate primping? Normally you would be right, but as you can see, this facility lacks the accoutremants of my own bathroom in England. I lack the tools to primp with. Also, my hair no longer requires the care I formally gave it, and I am not spending the time with my wardrobe. No, my preparations today will be brief. Though I did have something a little degenerate in mind, I will admit."<

The Major frowned. He saw where the Earl was going. Well, he supposed it would save time. Or not, he supposed he didn't really care at this point.

The Earl grinned mischievously as he began a silly striptease where he peeled off his sodden clothes once again.

*****

The Earl of Gloria positively beamed as he consumed his simple breakfast of dry toast while seated across the table from the Major. The Major glowered at him, but that only caused his grin to widen.

He simply could not take his eyes off the man. Could not believe his good luck. All those years! After all those years, why now? Had he finally realized he was gay? Had that near miss made him realize what the Earl meant to him? It truly puzzled Dorian whenever he thought on it. But then he would always decide not to look a gift horse in the mouth, and go along with the good fortune fate had offered him lately.

He watched the line of the Major's muscular jaw work as he chewed his breakfast, watched him squint angrily as he quickly went over his morning paper, saw the slight relief in his brow as he took a sip of his beloved Nescafe. His attentions eventually stopped drifting over to Dorian, he assumed on purpose, since he was making no secret of his study. He looked at the Major's eyes as they took in the lines on the page, then moved over the small nicks and scars that covered his face, less prominent in the morning after he'd shaved, but they'd left small spots where facial hair didn't grow, and the Major was the type of man who had a pretty thick beard in the morning.

His eye being blind had disturbed Dorian when he had seen it. He had prepared himself for the possibility, but he didn't think it would actually happen... one of those things you hear about, but don't expect, because why would something bad happen to someone like the Major?  Of course, he had wondered how the Major had withstood all the beating without actually having his brains spilled out over the floor, so he supposed an eye wasn't too terrible a thing to lose in comparison. The eye still looked like it worked, the pupil still dilated the same as the other eye, and the muscles moved it across the page as if it were taking in the words as well, but the color gave away the fact it was not at 100%. Dorian wondered if anyone other than himself would notice, then quickly reminded himself that spies tended to pick up on everything. The Major certainly did. Still, Dorian wondered if he could fake it for just a bit longer. He knew his job was everything to the Major, as much as Dorian tried to work his way into his life, and he would hate to think what would happen if he didn't have that to keep his mind occupied.

The scar next to his now-gray eye was still red-looking, but it was short, much smaller than he had imagined when it was described to him at the hospital. The one over his eye was longer and deeper, but still narrow. Thankfully, the man had only split the skin and not torn it, so it was not wide and would likely fade quite cleanly in a couple months. Besides, the Major would have his rather luscious, raven-black hair back by then.

Dorian's eyes moved up to his scalp, where his short hair was still growing back. It looked like a pretty normal short haircut, but he could tell by the man's morning routine that not having his hair long bothered him as much as it did Dorian. He saw the glance at the hairbrush and heard the quiet curse in German as he had looked at the mirror over his bureau while he was getting dressed that morning.

Dorian wondered idly if it was a vanity that kept the Major from keeping his hair in a standard military cut. He couldn't imagine what other reason he would have. He let himself briefly entertain a fantasy that it was a kink, and perhaps the Major enjoyed playing with long hair during sex. 

His heart sank a little at that thought. It was one of his own kinks, and he missed his golden curls more than he would ever admit. Playing dead while that awful man had cut his hair in the cell had been one of the hardest things he'd ever done. He would have preferred to be beaten about the face than lose his hair, it was his greatest vanity. Shaving what had been left afterwards had been easy. When he saw the Major had been scalped, he'd merely done it as a silent gesture of sympathy. He had no idea where the Major stood on the affectation of long hair, but after the hint this morning, he suspected it had been the right move. The Major had not asked him about why he had clearly shaved his head, but he suspected he knew anyway. So much went unsaid between them. It was both a blessing that they knew each other so well, and a kind of curse for Dorian's romantic heart, as well.

He finished off his first piece of toast as he thought back to the night before. The Major had been a great deal more shy than even he had been expecting. He was fifty years old, for God's sake, and he was acting like a schoolgirl! Dorian had gotten naked as a matter of course, hoping it would make the Major more comfortable, but he couldn't get him to take more than his shirt off, though his pants had vanished at some point later, probably after he had fallen asleep.  Dorian suspected The Major did it to spite him somehow. A pity. He couldn't even get him to take Dorian's pants off for him, though that shirt removal had been right up Dorian's alley. He closed his eyes and made his body remember the sensations from the night before. Yes, there had been a great deal to like about it, even if they hadn't gotten very far.

He had been expecting that the Major liked it rough. His bites mixed in with his kisses had been no surprise, and quite a relief to the Earl, since Dorian liked his sex play with a little bit of an edge. He hoped the Major would be willing to explore more options in the future.

Dorian frowned as he took a sip of his tea, remembering the one other thing that had disturbed him. The Major hadn't really... responded to anything Dorian had been doing. He had been eager enough for the caresses, and more than happy to kiss. Oh, he was a delightful kisser, better than Dorian could have hoped. His natural authoritativeness made his kisses hard and long, and very, very passionate. The tea was spoiling the memory of the taste of the Major in his mouth, who had tasted like cigarettes and something wonderful. Sometimes the smoking got on his nerves, but Dorian thought about picking the habit back up himself for the inevitable times he would be separated from the Major in the future.

But he couldn't get any sort of positive response out of the Major for anything he did. He had teased the man's nippies, licked them, bitten them, sucked them, done damn near everything he could think of. The Major had been eager enough to work on Dorian's own, and it had pleased him greatly. But he didn't seem to appreciate the return. He had also tried to return the rough kisses the Major had given him, but was mildly annoyed that the only response had been a request not to bite his neck or arms.

As for other signs of arousal... Dorian had begged the Major at least once to finish him off, just use his hand to stroke his penis so that he could come. He had needed to badly after about ten minutes with the Major, he had been so aroused and excited. But the Major had declined, which had baffled the Earl. I mean, what do you do in that situation? He continued for a few minutes, but his balls had begun to throb with the need to ejaculate, so he had to embarrass himself by turning away to finish. He had to do that two other times that night. He had asked for help the second time too, and merely excused himself the third time.

Really. Was it more embarrassing to touch someone whose nipples you were biting on their genitals than to have them masturbate in front of you while you wait to continue? The logic and modesty had been baffling and a little bit infuriating, but the Earl had to remind himself of his position and how precarious he was. He had no idea why the Major had suddenly opened his arms to the Earl, and he was deathly afraid that everything could end. It was a fear that had made him nearly sick while he was recovering. The pain of his operation and wounds had been nothing compared to the thought of losing Klaus forever because he had been silly enough to let himself get captured. He knew he would continue to follow the Major no matter what he said, but... after having his friendship, he felt like it almost would have been too painful to see him knowing that they would never really talk again.

Dorian had worked himself into a rather negative frame of mind as he focused on the last part of what had bothered him about last night. Despite the fact that Dorian could barely contain his sexual excitement, the Major had hardly become erect. He had been waiting for a full erection so that he could undo the Major's belt and free it from his trousers. It had gotten hard, but never reached a state of full erection. The problem really weighed heavily on Dorian's mind.

Well, perhaps it took a little more to arouse the Major than second base. He would have to work at the problem a little more. It was hard to imagine that the Major wasn't as excited about the new stage in their relationship as Dorian was, but Dorian had to remind himself that the Major had likely not had erotic dreams about Dorian every night for the past twelve years the same way the Earl had.

But oh! That rain! Those kisses! His teeth! The feel of his calloused hands roving all over his naked body! It had been even better than Dorian's wildest dreams. He could not believe his luck. And all there below that lucky linden tree. He'd have to remember to return and thank it later.

After they'd both spent themselves as much as they could on passion, they had collapsed into the soggy mud below the tree, amidst its roots, and slept. Dorian had curled with his head against the Major's slouched chest, right into the Major's arm, draped around him. He had thrown his leg over the Major's and held his arms around the man's chest and slept as he hadn't in several months. He was so, so glad that his feelings were returned. He was glad that he hadn't chased the man on a simple sexual whim all these years. The previous year had taught Dorian that Major Klaus Hinz von dem Eberbach really was his soul mate. They were a match physically, emotionally, and intellectually. It really was more than he could hope.

The shower this morning had been a little less fun than he'd expected. In fact, it had been downright disappointing. For whatever reason, the Major had not felt uncomfortable getting undressed in front of Dorian in the full light of morning. Dorian's mouth had watered at the sight of the Major's well-muscled body. He could feel himself stirring just thinking about it now, and he allowed himself a smile and his eyes to return to the Major, drifting over his torso and under the table. His rear alone would have been all he needed, but the Earl knew that the use of his rear for other than its intended purpose was strictly verboten. But aside from that, those huge muscled thighs, the well-defined calves, and the rippling muscles on his chest, combined with those big arms... it was too much. The muscles weren't too big... the Earl frowned as he recalled some fantasies that had ended unpleasantly when the Major had had the build of a professional bodybuilder, but goodness! They were just right.

Unfortunately, nothing had happened in the shower. It was big enough for two. The Major stoically ignored him as he set about washing himself. He had even pushed Dorian away when he'd tried to caress him and start with kisses. He had been nearly angry with the Major's tease, but just watching the man bend over and move around to wash himself while naked had necessitated another private session that needed to wait until the Major was out of the shower. God, that had taken forever, the Earl thought he wouldn't make it once again.

Damn that frigid German. He would have him moaning his name yet. His balls positively ached with every movement this morning, and he hoped the Major wouldn't suggest a leisurely stroll anytime soon.

Well, there was more to life than sex, after all. A thought occurred to him, and he wondered how the Major was at chess. He smiled as the man looked across the table with a straight face as he folded his newspaper and drained the last of his coffee.

Dorian happily suggested just that.

*****

The Major had to admit to himself, he was curious how well the thief played chess. Nobody had ever beaten the Major, not after he had finally defeated his father in his teens, but then again, not many people had enough courage to ask the Major to play any game.

But the damn smile on the thief's face. The butler would know. He scowled as he got up from the table. That crafty butler probably already knew, as old as he was. None of his business.

He caught the thief wincing out of the corner of his eye as he stood up from the table and frowned. What had they done last night that had hurt the thief? They hadn't done anything terribly strenuous. Unless... was he still suffering from the injuries from the incident?

>"Hey!"< He began, standing and waiting by the doorway into one of the parlors while he waited for the Earl to catch up with him. >"Why didn't you tell me your injuries were still bothering you? You infuriating degenerate! Go home to your doctor instead of staying out all night!"< The Major pulled his cigarettes out of his pocket and lit one as the man approached.

The Earl's face went from smiling to blank. >"My injuries? What are you talking about? That hasn't bothered me in over a month. My surgery was successful and the rest of it was just bumps and scratches. How could any of that actually bother me?"<

>"Do not lie to me, thief.  I saw you wince when you got up from the table. Did... did something we did last night re-injure your ribs, perhaps?"< The Major lost his furious tone, but still managed to look stern. He couldn't bear hurting the man, even if the thief was silent about it.

Rather than the sheepish look the Major was expecting, the Earl's face creased into a frown. It was the most cross the Major could recall seeing him look. It was worse, even, than all those times he sent him on wild goose chases in the Sahara desert looking for long lost treasure while the area was being bombed.

The Earl answered him in English. "Oh, no, it's not my previous injuries, Major von dem Eberbach. Quite frankly, if you must know why I'm having trouble walking today, it's because you are a lousy lover! Do you not know what happens if you make your lover wait when he needs to come? Honestly!" The Earl huffed and brushed past him, walking a bit slower than the Major could recall his stride.

The Major's face flamed red and he remained silent. He scanned his mind for clues about what the Earl was talking about, but he had no idea. Did it really hurt if the Major didn't... well, touch him to help out? Was it really the Major's fault that he had been injured? 

What?

Schiesse. This business was more complicated than he wanted to think about. He took a long drag on his cigarette and waited momentarily in the hallway for his facial color to go down. He was not giving the thief the pleasure of seeing him so out of sorts.

He started when he saw the Butler waiting in the doorway from the dining room, just ten feet away. How long had he been there? Did he speak English? The Major scanned his memory, but really couldn't remember. Some of the old folks couldn't, he silently prayed the butler was among them.

>"Sir, I was wondering if you wanted coffee brought into the game with you."<

Right. The older ones were more likely to know the old language. Great. The Major kept his face straight and answered in German. "Yes. Coffee would be fine, thank you." He finished his cigarette and realized he would need to smoke at least one more. Right away.

The Butler nodded, smiled, then raised his voice. "Earl Gloria?  Would you like tea brought in?" He asked in English.

"Yes, please!" Came the cheery, muffled reply from inside the room.

"Right away, sir!" The butler turned and then vanished into the dining room.

Schiesse.

He lit another cigarette, took a deep drag, and went into the room where the Earl was waiting, somehow with the crystal chess set set up on a table between two overstuffed armchairs.

He rolled his eyes. Trust the thief to know where everything was kept. He didn't give him the satisfaction of a response as he sat down at the opposite chair.

The Earl looked slightly disappointed as he took the first move.

*****

After four straight losses, Dorian finally conceded defeat. He tipped his king over sourly and glanced up to see the Major grinning sarcastically and putting a cigarette between his lips. He looked positively angelic when he smiled, but the smile was never for the right reasons.

The Earl sighed and pushed himself back in the chair, staring at the ceiling and wondering what came next. It was too early to eat another meal, and he still didn't care to go for a walk. He didn't dare try his luck in the bedroom again, he didn't think himself so lucky. Surprisingly, the Major spoke up, and even more surprisingly, he sounded as if he was in a truly good mood.

>"What have you done these past two months to pass the time?"<

Dorian arched his eyebrows. It was extremely uncharacteristic of the Major to inquire into his affairs, especially since he didn't particularly want the details. He was always a good sport about listening the Earl gush occasionally over a new toy, he just didn't want to know the hows and whys.

Even so. Dorian sighed and looked over at the man. >"Well, not much. I've stayed at home, mostly. Recovering, moping, being in a bad mood, you know. I'm sure you had much the same problems here. I believe that trip I took to America was the first time I'd left home since I got back."<

The Major didn't answer, simply stared across at the Earl. It always unsettled the Earl when he did this. It had been his habit for years, but lately the Earl was having to read more into the silence. Or maybe he shouldn't. It would never do to get his hopes up when it came to the Major. But he was going to be either very angry... for whatever reason, the man got angry at the drop of a hat, or he was thinking about Dorian. Dorian preferred the latter, but again, he had been conditioned over a number of years to think that foolish.

Still looking content, the Major broke the silence as he exhaled a cloud of smoke. >"I was mostly bedridden. I left on a 4-day trip as soon as I was clear to leave bed. The doctor was not pleased when I returned. I haven't left since then. I am tired of sitting around the house."< The Major paused awkwardly and looked away before continuing. >"Would you care for a drive?"<

It really was adorable how bashful the man was. He wouldn't have suspected this level of sensitivity from the Major. Then again, he was also surprisingly insensitive about a lot of things. But these new sides of him were quite endearing. 

And most importantly, a drive wouldn't require walking. The Earl pulled himself gingerly from the seat and took a bow. >"I would be delighted. The destination does not interest me. We can go where you like."< He snapped back up straight and smiled. >"Perhaps we could stay out the rest of the day. I would like to eat dinner out, maybe."<

The Major stubbed out his cigarette and stood. >"Good.  My Mercedes hasn't been run in two months. It needs to be driven just as much as I need to be out of this house."< He began walking out of the room and towards the front entrance.

The Earl followed, and grinned once again as they passed through the Rodin doorway. >"Most people wouldn't mind being cooped up in a castle as large as yours, I must say."<

The Major's steps grew more heavy and he picked up the stride and cadence he used while on missions. The Earl had to trot to keep up with him as they made their way to the Mercedes, parked in the U-shaped lane. The Major unlocked the car and slid behind the wheel, gripping it for a moment before starting the engine and waiting for the Earl to get himself situated.

>"Most people were not raised in the von dem Eberbach family."< The Major offered crisply before pulling away at a decent clip.

Dorian had to laugh. He really was just the Major through and through.

*****

He was not laughing when they got to their location, however. He hadn't minded the rather scenic drive through Germany. It had even prompted a nice conversation between the two.

*****

"Oh, damn." Dorian had said aloud in English as they passed a road sign.

"What?" The Major responded in English as well.

"It's that rotten poem. I have it stuck in my head."

"Please do me the favor of not reciting poetry on this trip." The Major replied drily.

"I can't help it. It's like a cold. It runs through my head until I get it out. I hate it. This is the only one that won't leave me alone until I say it out loud."

The Major grumbled and cursed in German under his breath. Dorian smiled and continued.

"You know, passing the signs did it. You shouldn't have taken this way. The town name. I can't help it. 'Hamelin town's in Brunswick, by famous Hanover city;  The River Weser, deep and wide, washes its wall on the southern side;  A pleasanter spot you never spied;  But, when begins my ditty, almost five hundred years ago, to see townsfolk suffer so from vermin, was a pity. Rats!'"

"Enough!" bellowed the Major. "Your usual degenerate poetry is too much, do not make it rhyme!"

"See! That's why it gets stuck in my head! I had to memorize the whole thing as a boy and recite it when I was eight. The damn thing won't leave me alone. It runs through my head all the way whenever I am reminded of it." Dorian pouted. "There's just nothing to be done about it."

The Major fumed silently for a few minutes. They rode in silence. Then, to Dorian's complete shock, the Major spoke.

"Wer ist der bunte Mann im Bilde?  Er führet Böses wohl im Schilde, Er pfeift so wild und so bedacht; Ich hätt mein Kind ihm nicht gebracht..."

The Major cut himself off, then continued in German. "Damn you, thief, now I have that running through my head, too! A lot of childish rhyming nonsense."

Dorian had to keep from laughing out loud. The Major looked genuinely cross, and he probably was. All the same, the poetry practically begged to be commented on. And he knew the Major would forgive him the push. In a little while, at least.

"So I take it you were forced to memorize "Der Rattenfänger von Hamelin" as a boy? How delightful! And what a coincidence that we should both know our country's matched rhymed verse on the same topic." The Earl continued his side of the conversation in English, while the Major continued in German.

"Yes, yes." The Major snapped. "I had to memorize it and recite it in front of a group of sisters when I was 10. Bloody embarrassing. It was the last time I've ever had to do something like that."

"Oh, that's not true!" The Earl interjected without thinking. "You performed that lovely Tyrolean dance in Salzberg for everyone but me! I've never quite forgiven you for that, you know." The Earl pursed his lips as he realized he had just crossed a line he probably shouldn't have. He watched the Major out of the corner of his eye.

He was not disappointed. The Major snapped and began to yell. "Wanker! I had completely wiped that incident from my mind! What a bloody disaster, thanks to you! That entire mission was a mess, you botched absolutely everything at every turn! And you..."

"Major! Do not launch yourself into such a tantrum while you are driving!"

"Hmpf." The Major clenched his jaw and let the tide of his anger recede before continuing.  "You bloody degenerate. Dressing in women's clothes and making me dance the Emperor's Waltz with you. And you still never gave me that photo back! I've never been so close to killing you as I was that night. I was ready to send A and B on a mission of national security, soas not to let my image fall into the wrong hands." The Major smirked. There had been a good reason to get the photo back, even if he knew the thief wasn't going to be giving it to anyone.

"Hmf." The Earl snorted. "You wouldn't have danced with me if I hadn't dressed in women's clothes. I thought it was a just reward for taking a punch from that awful Russian. The picture was just part of the payment." Dorian crossed his arms and closed his eyes as he settled back into the seat in a pout. "I deserved a reward for my work recovering the microfilm that time." His eyes snapped open as he turned to the Major. "And what about your image falling into the wrong hands! Is your face a state secret? Funny that billions of people saw it when you rode up with the English Crown Jewels in front of Gorbachev and the Queen."

Dorian felt his heart leap into his throat as the Major jerked the wheel suddenly to the side and forced the Mercedes off the road and into a dead stop.

The Major turned and fixed the Earl with a glare that Dorian knew had caused many spies and terrorists to cough up secrets over the years. 

Dorian grinned. Ever since the first time the Major had pulled his punches for him, it had never worked.

He continued to smile angelically as the Major pounded his fists into the steering wheel and swore long and loud in German for several minutes. He finished and sat in silence for a few minutes, then lit a cigarette and started the car back up to swing back out into the highway traffic.

Dorian frowned. It was not wise to bring the matter up now, but the Major had always been something of a terrifying driver. He wasn't sure that not having any depth perception due to his recently lost eye would help matters much, but it couldn't make much difference on a Sunday drive. And if it did, well... at least he'd be dying together with the Major, right?

The Major spoke again, bringing the Earl out of his worries. "You were ten times more trouble than the KGB ever was while it was active. You've sent me running on more wild goose chases across more countries than all of my enemies combined."

"What would you have done without me? I know you loved pulling off those complicated missions, and I loved seeing you. You can't tell me that your missions have been as exciting since you made me promise to be good."

The Major sighed. Dorian knew he had scored a point. The Major loved nothing more than bossing people around and figuring out complicated maneuvers. In addition to being assigned more and more old-man missions, even the best missions had been much less rewarding without the Earl. He could tell by the way the Major spoke of them briefly, compared to how he spoke of his old missions.

Of course, the Major would never admit that to Dorian. Dorian smiled, knowing the silence was damning him anyway.

After another minute of silence, the Major broke through again, still speaking in German. "I was embarrassed to recite that poem in front of the sisters when I was ten because it was something I had known since I was much younger. That story had always fascinated me."

"Oh?" The Earl continued his half of the conversation in English. "The fairy tale about not following strangers."

The Major turned his head to look at Dorian with his good eye, then turned back to the road. "No. It was no fairy tale. It was true, they think. The earliest documented history of the town was a ten-year commemoration of the disappearance of the children."

The blood drained from the Earl's face. "What?"

"Yes, all the children really did disappear from Hamelin. It was why the story fascinated me as a child. It was a lesson not to talk to strangers and to be good, but... when I was young, it made me think about what that real person could have done to lure all the children out. The fairy tales didn't have much interest for me, but that one did, because an entire village of children disappeared without a trace.

Dorian faced forward. He always had a slight belief in the supernatural, and quite frankly, the idea of the pied piper as a real person terrified him. "No. It can't be real. How did it happen? He couldn't have taken every child in town, only a few."

The Major shrugged. "That writing still exists, on the side of a building in Hamelin called the Piper's House. The commemoration doesn't say how it happened, and the oral stories only offer the music explanation.  It really must have been a compelling song he played."

"Well. What did he do with the children?"

"It is not known. He simply vanished. As an adult, I don't like to think about it."

"Oh."

Well, thought Dorian, that had certainly put a damper on his good time. He stared out the passenger window and watched the sun set behind the hills. The two were silent for several minutes, and another thought occurred to Dorian.

"We haven't turned back for Bonn yet. Where are we going? Do you have a destination in mind?"

The Major smiled as he puffed on his cigarette. "The famous city that Hamelin is near."

Dorian looked puzzled. "Hamburg?"

"Yes."

*****